"Every single women's movie has the obligatory vibrator scene. And women do not, in my experience, talk about vibrators. Or men's buns. The women who do talk about men's buns think they should because they've seen Diet Coke ads." - Jennifer Tilly
"Everybody knows that love goes away." - Jennifer Tilly
"Everyone said that if you want to be a real actor, go to New York. If you want to sell out, go to LA. And I thought - I want to sell out!" - Jennifer Tilly
"I cannot stand it when celebrities think they're being clever and say they keep it in the bathroom or use it as a doorstop. I'd put mine on the mantel where everybody would notice it. I would put it in a special little alcove like a household saint." - Jennifer Tilly
"I had a problem with cops pulling me over all the time for speeding. When I was doing Hill Street Blues, the cops said how much they loved the show as they were writing me up; meanwhile my insurance went through the roof." - Jennifer Tilly
"I have another sister too, Becky. When the three of us get together it's really bizarre, because we have this sort of psychic link-we all start to talk in unison, with the exact same inflections. In high school, everyone called us the Three Musketeers." - Jennifer Tilly
"I have my cards read every time I pass a tarot-reader booth. I would be so embarrassed to have one of those 900 numbers appear on my phone bill, because I don't know how I would explain it to my business manager. It would almost be like saying, Okay, I'm white trash." - Jennifer Tilly
"I have never been with a man who has performed any kind of good cunnilingus. Guys always act really bored. It's like they're... doing you a favor." - Jennifer Tilly
"I have to tell you, I'm not like Demi Moore, where the tears trickle prettily down my cheeks. My whole face screws up and it's like, Oh please, get a room." - Jennifer Tilly
"I think in the beginning, God can't decide if someone's going to be male or female. So he gives you everything and sometimes it isn't until the very last moment that he decides, and sometimes he doesn't make up his mind fast enough. It's like, Uh-oh, whoops! and you get a hermaphrodite." - Jennifer Tilly
"I was cut out of The Doors. I was Okie Girl, a groupie. The powers that be thought that my character made Jim Morrison look too sleazy, if you can imagine. I saw the movie-it was so loud I had a headache for three days." - Jennifer Tilly
"I was one of those people who pulls the cooler around and everybody glares at because you take up too much room in the elevator. We got 15 cents if we sold a sandwich and 25 cents if we sold a salad, so I was always trying to push the salad." - Jennifer Tilly
"I would rather be loved by somebody who respected me." - Jennifer Tilly
"If you have Julia Roberts in a movie you're never really afraid for her because you know she's not going to die." - Jennifer Tilly
"My mother had all these maxims-like, classy girls never chew gum, never read comic books, never get their ears pierced, never get their hair dyed." - Jennifer Tilly
"That Hollywood thing, where everybody hugs and kisses everybody else-I always stiffen. It's an assumed familiarity. It's phony." - Jennifer Tilly
"The people I've been intimate with underestimate me the most. Love warps a person's perception of you. A guy in a relationship with you sees what he wants to see, and it takes a long time for that to, you know, transmogrify." - Jennifer Tilly
