"After thirty, a body has a mind of its own." - Bette Midler
"Cats always seem so very wise, when staring with their half-closed eyes. Can they be thinking, "I'll be nice, and maybe she will feed me twice?"" - Bette Midler
"Cherish forever what makes you unique, 'cuz you're really a yawn if it goes." - Bette Midler
"I always try to balance the light with the heavy - a few tears of human spirit in with the sequins and the fringes." - Bette Midler
"I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing." - Bette Midler
"I feel like a million tonight - but one at a time." - Bette Midler
"I made a pact with myself a long time ago: Never watch anything stupider than you. It's helped me a lot." - Bette Midler
"I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me." - Bette Midler
"I never know how much of what I say is true." - Bette Midler
"I try not to drink too much because when I'm drunk, I bite." - Bette Midler
"I wouldn't say I invented tacky, but I definitely brought it to its present high popularity." - Bette Midler
"I'd make a wonderful Lady Macbeth. I'll wear a pair of platform shoes or something." - Bette Midler
"I'm working my way toward divinity." - Bette Midler
"If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?" - Bette Midler
"My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors." - Bette Midler
"Rap is poetry set to music. But to me it's like a jackhammer." - Bette Midler
"The worst part of success is to try to find someone who is happy for you." - Bette Midler
"When it's three o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London." - Bette Midler
"Writing a book is not as tough as it is to haul thirty-five people around the country and sweat like a horse five nights a week." - Bette Midler
